Who Comes Up With This Stuff?

I'd love to know where this sort of thing comes from. There must be an army of hidden wags toiling in obscurity.


A woman in a hot air balloon realized she

was lost.


She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a

boat below. She shouted to him, "Excuse me, can you help me?

I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago,

but I don't know where I am."



The sailor consulted his portable GPS and replied,

"You're in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet

above a ground elevation of 2346 feet above sea

level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north

latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west

longitude.



She rolled her eyes and yelled down, "You must be a

Republican."


"I am," replied the man. "How did you know?"


"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you

told me is technically correct, but I have no idea

what to do with your information, and I'm still

lost. Frankly, you've been no help to me."


The man smiled and responded, "Then you must be a

Democrat."


"I am," replied the balloonist. "How did you know?"


"Well," said the man, "you don't know where you are

or where you're going. You've risen to where you

are, due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a

promise that you have no idea how to keep, and you

expect me to solve your problem. You're in exactly

the same position you were in before we met, but,

somehow, now it's my fault."